I'm worth failing

I'm worth failing
I'm really nothing at all
Spit it out because I taste bitter but the taste all the same still longing
Still familiar

Stay up
Stay awake
To hear me calling
At the break still black
And waiting

Retrace every line that was heard
And laugh at the sound of being rehearsed
Choke and smile and speak your heart out
Cough and look away at your queue

Am I still suffocating?